Wednesday, September 22, 2010

The Why

The last month of my life has been a little rough. My house is still looking a little bit like a bunker because we are still hiding from my friend's soon-to-be ex-husband. Every noise in the night is still a little bit frightening.

I am working all of the time and barely keeping up. Money is still really tight. I've been trying to finish Career Ladder and my Capstone project for graduate school.

My mind is always whirring. I am thinking about test scores and account balances and locking the door and deadlines. I find myself looking at the calendar all the time to estimate the date when money trouble and friend drama and Career Ladder and Graduate School and lesson plans will be over.

Okay, I am getting all of this off my chest because it is time to turn the corner.

I use this blog always to speak the truth. I've said before and I will say again, "In education, we have to lie all the time." I never want to be politically correct and well-behaved on my blog. Sometimes it really sucks working in education. I always give myself license to say that here because I would go CRAZY if I were to pretend that is not the case.

However, my life as a teacher is also rewarding and filled with beautiful moments that pass by like perfect white clouds in a blue sky. I have only so much time to record my thoughts and experiences in writing, and I have to wonder which thoughts really merit recording. I witness hundreds of stories daily. I could cry a river about the tiny tragedies I witness daily, but sometimes I should take time to remember the rainbows. So, for a while, I am going to use my blogging time to reflect on the amazing things I get to see and sometimes have a part in--the things that make all the other stuff worth it.

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