Thursday, January 7, 2010

Bad Habits

The past four days I have gone home from work before four o'clock, taken a four hour nap, and eaten a huge meal. I am having a really hard time adjusting to my work schedule again after two weeks off. I feel so hungry and so tired throughout the day. At first, I thought maybe I am getting sick, but then it occurred to me that I don't usually take two weeks off the way I did. I ate whenever I was hungry and slept as late as I wanted to. I don't usually think of my work schedule and habits as grueling, but now I am feeling it.

The thing is that work has gone really smoothly. The day seems to fly by, but at the end of it I am exhausted and starving.

"Well," I thought today, "I have developed some bad habits that I need to break!"

I have developed some bad habits, but not over break. I developed bad habits of hardly eating anything during a nine or ten hour work day. I developed bad habits of never sitting down during my so called breaks. I developed bad habits of ignoring hunger, illness, and exhaustion whenever I am focused on something (which at work is most of the time).

I am not saying that I think my life should be like one long break filled with naps and grazing. I think I need to find a more balanced way to teach, though.

Some people do it. They bring snacks, they find a way to relax, they don't get to school ridiculously early. I think that my problem is that at times I can be extremely focused. Sometimes this is good because it helps me solve problems and get things accomplished, but sometimes I forget to eat anything until I start feeling really sick. Sometimes I stay up really late and wake up really early until I finish a task or solve a problem. I also tend to be unaware of what is going on around me when I get really focused. I don't remember where I set my keys down etc, etc.

It is hard for me to teach--especially with a difficult class (which I don't have this year, but did last year)--without going to that really focused place. I need to think about teaching while putting less stress on me. I lost so much weight last year and I was so tired. This year has been better, but obviously I am still keeping some bad habits.

So, I am adding one New Years resolution for myself. I have got to be more organized about eating throughout the day, getting enough sleep, and dividing my focus instead of tunneling in on one thing.

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